


Remus Wrocks: Maybe Tomorrow

by KateKintail



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fantasizing, M/M, Masturbation, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-14
Updated: 2014-01-14
Packaged: 2018-01-08 16:55:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1135145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KateKintail/pseuds/KateKintail
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone in Hogwarts was convinced Sirius and Remus were an amazing couple. Everyone, that is, except for Sirius. Written for LMoM 2009.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remus Wrocks: Maybe Tomorrow

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This world and its characters do not belong to me in any way. I in no way profit from this.
> 
> Challenge: Lusty Month of May 2009
> 
> Author’s Notes: This is a special year for me—my fifth attempt at LMOM! So I decided this time around to celebrate by choosing some of my favorite WRock songs and writing fics inspired by some of their lyrics.

So I asked myself ‘what will it take  
For you to see me in that way?’  
~’Maybe Tomorrow’ by The Remus Lupins

Everyone in Hogwarts considered Sirius Black and Remus Lupin to be the hottest couple in the school. Professors gave them knowing smiles. Students gossiped about catching glimpses of the two of them snogging. Moreover, people unashamedly discussed what two assumed in privacy. Ellen McCaulahay of Hufflepuff swore their wands were used for more than spells. Bernice Garlin of Ravenclaw had read the Karma Sutra and swore that the two favored the positions on pages five and eight. Even James Potter claimed to have walked into the dormitory room and interrupted them more than once. Everyone in Hogwarts was convinced Sirius and Remus were an amazing couple. 

Everyone, that is, except for Sirius. 

No matter how many people whispered about them, Sirius was utterly oblivious to the fact that he was supposed to be madly in love with Remus. 

Remus, on the other hand, was madly in love with Sirius. He gazed dreamily at Sirius at every available moment, hoping Sirius would notice. He dreamed about the man both when he was awake and asleep. He went out of his way to pass Sirius things, just to have the opportunity for his fingers to brush Sirius’ skin. He nuzzled the dog, Padfoot, hoping his wolfish affection would be a sign. He even dropped at least one cleverly worded hint every day. 

But Sirius seemed immune and uninterested. 

And Remus was desperate. 

They sat in the Gryffindor Common Room, doing their homework assignments together one Sunday evening. James was out at Quidditch practice and Peter was doing a detention for getting caught trying to slip a newt into the Slytherin’s gravy boat the week before. That left Sirius and Remus on their own, which was how Remus most liked it. Naturally, he would have liked it better if Sirius weren’t such a daft, unobservant berk. Perhaps subtlety was not the proper approach to catch Sirius Black.

“This homework from Professor Slughorn is torturous, isn’t it, Sirius?” Remus said as he sucked on the end of his quill in what he hoped was a suggestive way. He worked his lips around it slowly, staring unblinkingly at Sirius with deep, amber eyes. “I find it… hard. How about you? Hard?”

Sirius shrugged. “It’s pretty easy, really. You just need to remember to balance out your formulas with variations of the constant, base ingredients.”

Remus stopped sucking but kept staring at Sirius. His eyes went wider. 

With a hearty laugh, Sirius leaned back, tipping his chair and balancing on the back two legs. He wore a great grin. “Didn’t understand a word of that, did you?”

Remus shook his head then hung it, looking miserable. “Can you help? Please?” 

“Of course.” Sirius lowered his chair back down to all fours with a bump. Remus desperately hoped the handsome Sirius would jump up, walk over, and hover over Remus in order to explain the frustratingly backwards concept. Remus would be able to feel the heat from proximity. He would be able to inhale Sirius’ tempting scent. He would be so close he might even be able to hear that steady, reassuring heartbeat. 

Instead of getting up, however, Sirius just slid a piece of parchment across the table. “Go on, copy. They’re brilliant.”

Remus bit his lip. “You’re brilliant,” he said, trying to sound genuinely grateful. He probably could have figured the concept out on his own if he had taken the time. But his libido had taken over completely. 

Sirius just leaned back again and clunked the heels of his shoes up onto the edge of the table. He crossed his arms over his chest and grinned haughtily. “I know.”

*

Remus lay in bed that night, unable to fall asleep, whatever he did. He’d tried reading, which was usually enough to send him off within twenty minutes, assuming he didn’t get too absorbed in the story. But tonight, every plot point reminded him of his situation and every character reminded him of Sirius. He stared up at the top of his canopy bed, wishing a solution would form there for him. But the only thing for it was just to finally sit Sirius down and tell him straight out. Remus shivered with nervousness. Maybe tomorrow he could do it. 

Tonight, there was only one thing he could think of that would do him any good at all. And before he began it, he wanted to be sure he was free to do it. He listened carefully to the sounds in the dormitory. The deep, slow breaths with the tiny little click on the inhalation were James’. The terrible but steady snores belonged to none other than Peter. And the breaths with the low rumble in them naturally meant Sirius was asleep. Though, damn, even his breaths sounded sexy. 

Remus had it bad. He almost didn’t even realize that his hand had slipped into his pajama bottoms until his body tingled. Remus wanted a spectacular orgasm tonight—something that would clear his mind and tire out his body. But more than just wanting it, his body seemed to crave it. As his hand pulled back his foreskin and curled around his cock, desire for an orgasm was overtaken by urge. He had to come or explode; there was no other option. 

Remus’ other hand undid a button on his button-down shirt. It slipped in-between two fastened buttons so that his fingertips could pinch a nipple. That made him tingle again. Between the tingle and the urge, Remus’ back arched off the bed. His head turned to one side, then the other, eyes closed, face nuzzling into his pillow as much as it could. 

He thrust his cock into his fist but found he couldn’t go as fast as he would have liked. The waistband and size of his pants were confining. So he uttered a spell to make them vanish. The sudden, cold air against his privates made him cringe, but that only lasted for a moment. When he began stroking, his cock re-hardened with an unparalleled vengeance. 

Remus could imagine Sirius there with him, with that haughty grin. Sirius would lounge there casually beside him, in tight leather pants. Or, better yet, in nothing at all. In his mind’s eye, Remus watched Sirius’ calm, floppy cock slowly rise. It looked just like it did when Remus caught a glimpse of it in the showers or at a urinal, only better somehow because fantasy Sirius’ cock was stiff for him. Fantasy Sirius wanted Remus to look. Fantasy Sirius wanted Remus to wank off to him. 

And Remus was more than ready to do just that. Remus’ toes curled and uncurled. His head flopped from side to side. His body trembled and shuddered with that rising urge. His hand went faster. His breathing was shallow. His heart raced, almost unable to keep up with the rest of his body. He squeezed and pulled, teased and tweezed. 

So close. So close. So close. He wasn’t going to make it without the word, though. He took a deep breath and let it out with a whimpered “Sirius!” 

Then it came, powerful and wet, all over his shirt and chest where the shirt was opened. Warm and sticky but so beautifully blissful that his head spun. He wanted to enjoy it but the orgasm used itself up and faded away. The tingle remained for a brief moment then faded as well. Remus smiled a knowing smile that could easily have rivaled Fantasy Sirius’. 

“Moony?”

Horrified, Remus opened his eyes just in time to see the curtains around his bed part. As a head poked in, Remus only just managed to pull his feather comforter up to hide himself. How much had Sirius seen? How much could Sirius smell? How much had Sirius figured out?

“I thought I heard my name. Are you all right?”

Remus nodded his head so vigorously it could have bobbed right off his body. “Fine!” he exclaimed, far too late to disguise the panic in his voice. 

Sirius slid one of the curtains aside and hopped up onto the bed. Concern showed on his face and he put a hand down on Remus in what was supposed to be a comforting way. But through the thick comforter Remus could feel the heaviness against his bare crotch and thigh. He was glad he’d just reached orgasm, else he would have been in quite a mess. Hard as it was to tell Sirius about this, he didn’t want Sirius finding out this way. Sirius cocked his head like a dog examining, trying to understand. “I know what’s wrong.”

Remus swallowed hard. “You… do?”

With a self-assured nod, “Yeah. You had a bad dream, didn’t you? You woke up, worried and disoriented, and called for a friend. That’s it, isn’t it?”

Biting his lip, Remus wondered how he should answer. 

Sirius didn’t wait for confirmation. “Well, it’s all right now. The nightmare’s over. And if you want, you can come over to my bed. Or I can climb into yours. Sometimes having company is enough to help.” 

For one glorious moment in time, Remus actually considered the offer. He could already vividly imagine Sirius lying beside him all night long. Maybe Remus would be able to drape an arm over him. Maybe Sirius would end up spooning him. Maybe Remus should just break down and tell him. Or maybe not. 

“No, I’m all right now. Thanks, though, Pads.” 

Sirius shrugged. “Suit yourself. G’night then.” 

He slid off the bed on the edge and pulled the hangings closed. 

Remus lay in the darkness of his bed, filled with worry and regret. Maybe tomorrow he would work up the courage, because tonight he’d gone from hinting to lying to Sirius, and that was unacceptable. 

After uttering a cleaning spell, Remus rolled onto his side and wished for a nightmare that would bring Sirius back to his side.

*

James and Lily were the only two seventh years at the Gryffindor table when Remus arrived there for breakfast the next morning. They sat across from each other at the table, hands clasped between a bowl of biscuits and a plate of bacon strips. Yawning, Remus took a seat beside Lily.

“Late night?” James asked with a wink that made Remus feel uneasy. He would have to work on perfecting those silencing charms. 

Lovely Lily read the situation like a book and gave Remus a sweet smile. Then she kindly changed the topic. “James and I were just discussing his upcoming match against Ravenclaw.”

Nodding, James said, “I was saying that Kent bloke they got as a beater this year looks intimidating, but we can take him.”

“And I was saying that if your head got any bigger, Head Boy, your neck wouldn’t be able to hold it up.”

James grinned. “You love it, though.”

Lily smiled back. “I do, though.”

And, suddenly, the topic change made Remus feel even worse. Being teased about masturbation was one thing. Watching two of his friends getting so close and sweet with each other… watching two of his friends being madly in love when he couldn’t have who he loved… it was torture. Remus piled food on his plate, not thinking about what he was taking, and began shaking his head. “I should go. I have to finish another three inches for Muggle Studies.”

“Remus.” James looked concerned; James knew him too well. “You don’t have to go.” He let go of Lily’s hand and picked up an apple, which he set down in the middle of the stash of food Remus had procured to nearly overflowing proportions. 

“I can help you with the essay if you want,” Lily volunteered. “I know just about everything there is to know about muggles, after all.”

But Remus shook his head. “No… I… I should really just go. There’s nothing for it. I’ve got to…” 

Remus’ words died away at once the moment Sirius Black walked through the door. Frozen momentarily, Remus followed the young man with his eyes. He imagined what it would be like for Sirius to come in and make a beeline for him. Sirius would take Remus in his arms and kiss him as passionately as the rest of the school would expect. There would be fireworks, explosions, or sparks at the very least. 

As Sirius neared, Remus snapped out of his delusions. His heart raced and it suddenly occurred to him that Sirius was going to sit down at the table. And Remus desperately wanted Sirius’ choice of seats to be next to him. So in one graceful movement, Remus pushed his bag off the bench. Unfortunately, it wasn’t closed properly. Papers and books flew everywhere. Fortunately, the ink bottle stayed corked. But the mess still made Remus cringe inwardly. He wished he could ignore it, but his assignments were right there, crinkled and bent. 

Remus could not help but reach down to pick up his strewn-about things. When he resurfaced, clutching his books and papers, he found Sirius had taken a seat already. Sirius sat on the opposite side of the table, on the other side of James. It was just about as far away from Remus as he could be. He would have been closer if he’d chosen to sit at the Hufflepuff table. For all that, he might have taken a seat in Antarctica and Remus would have felt closer to him. 

Sirius laughed as he helped himself to some bacon and eggs. “What happened, Remus? Is tossing your homework a new technique? Want to throw mine, too?”

Remus put on a fake smile. “Hand slipped.” Then he added, “Good thing it was just my books and not my pumpkin juice, aye?”

Remus had been hoping for a laugh of agreement or even a smile. Instead, Sirius looked like he hadn’t even heard Remus. The young man just launched into a discussion about Quidditch with James.

Under the table, Lily found Remus’ hand and gave it an encouraging squeeze. He looked into her eyes, and she mouthed the words, ‘Just tell him.’ But Remus shook his head. He felt foolish and devastated all at once; there was no way he could say anything now, even if he had known what to say. 

‘Maybe tomorrow,’ Remus mouthed back.

*

Potions that day went abysmally for Remus. His lightening potion turned into a solid during the first try, and the second batch ate right through his cauldron. Not only did that mean he would receive no grade from Professor Slughorn, but Remus would have to write home and ask for money his parents didn’t have for a new cauldron. 

Care of Magical Creatures was equally miserable. They were learning about unicorns and the animal Professor Kettleburn had acquired for them to study went crazy when it caught a whiff of Remus. Even though it was half a month away from the full moon and Remus was in his least wolfish stage, the unicorn knew what he was nonetheless. It whinnied and bucked. It snorted and stomped. Worse yet, it continually charged at the magical fence restraining it. It hit the fence so many times it started limping where its legs had hit the barrier. Worrying that the whole class would be able to figure him out if he left and the unicorn behaved itself afterwards, Remus was stuck there until the professor declared the whole lesson a wash and cancelled class. To compensate, he assigned twice as much homework as usual. Remus took it personally and felt guilty about it for hours afterwards. 

Lunch began miserably as well. Remus didn’t feel much like eating at first. He picked at his food, choking down a few torn, dry bites of bread. The taste of the food made him feel ill and he couldn’t imagine trying to eat anything more exotic than bland bread. His stomach was queasy and his mind was tired. It was only Peter poking him and urging him to have some soup that finally turned it around. Peter rubbed his back and forced a spoon into his hand. Remus tried a spoonful of soup. The warmth was energizing. He tried a second and a third. Then, hungrily, he picked up his sandwich and took a proper bite of that. Despite the fact that Sirius still sat across the table and wasn’t looking in Remus’ direction, Remus finally managed to enjoy his meal a little.

When Sirius got up and strolled over to the Slytherin table to drop a few insults in his brother’s direction, Remus sat back and sighed. He didn’t feel as bad as before, but he still wished Sirius would at least notice him in the way that he wanted to be noticed. 

Peter patted Remus’ back again. “You could just tell him you love him.”

Horrified by Peter’s bluntness, Remus shushed him. “I don’t love him!” Remus said. Infatuation was different, wasn’t it? He wanted Sirius in bed. He wanted Sirius all the time. He wanted Sirius in every possible way there was to want a person. “All right, I do love him. But I can’t tell him.”

“Why not? Just tell him how you feel.” It all seemed perfectly easy to Peter. The young man clearly understood nothing about the intricacies of emotions and relationships.

“That’s what I’ve been telling him to do,” Lily said, leaning in and inviting herself into the conversation again. 

Then, Remus was overpowered at three against one. “If you talk, Sirius will listen,” said James.

But Remus shook his head. He gestured over to the Hufflepuff table where Sirius was chatting up some girl. “What if he doesn’t like blokes?” 

“Believe me,” said James, his voice steady and serious. “Padfoot likes blokes just as much as he likes birds. If not more.”

Remus worried his bottom lip between his thumb and forefinger. “But what if he doesn’t fancy me?” 

Neither James nor Peter could answer that to his satisfaction. However, Lily reached over and took Remus’ hand. She squeezed it. “You’ll never know if you don’t ask.”

Remus nodded. “Maybe… maybe tomorrow.”

*

Charms went beautifully for a change. They were working on complex, nonverbal spells. By the middle of the class period, Lily could perform them flawlessly each time. But by the end of the class period, Remus was among the handful of students who could also do it. Remus felt an amazing sense of accomplishment as he thought the spell and felt the magic rush through his body and out of his wand. Every so often, it was almost effortless, in fact. 

Defense Against the Dark Arts only extended the high Remus was on. With his classmates all watching, he correctly identified which spells had been preformed to yield the sample results in the pictures the professor had displayed. After ten for ten, the class actually applauded for him. When they moved on to practical lessons, Remus successfully deflected every spell sent his way, including one the professor tried to take him off guard with. He had earned several hundred points for Gryffindor, two A’s, and as much respect from his classmates as he could ever hope for. He had never had a better class period in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

Going into dinner, Remus Lupin was on the top of the world. He barely noticed when Sirius Black sat down on the opposite side of the table and talked to a pretty sixth year Gryffindor girl who sat next to him. The fact that there were chocolate pastries for dessert was icing on the cake. Remus polished two off then, as soon as the mess on the table had disappeared down below to the house elves in the kitchens, Remus decided it was time to make his move. 

With sugar coursing through him and adrenaline overpowering him, Remus got up off the bench and stood behind it, staring at the table. He counted out three full seconds, bravery and confidence rising with each second. “One hippogriff. Two hippogriffs. Three hippogriffs!” Then he stepped up onto the bench half of the house was still sitting on. 

But Remus Lupin did not stop there. His toes wiggled for a moment, and then he took one more step forward. His dark black shoes touched down on the wooden tabletop. If it were any other day, any other moment, Remus probably would have slipped or skidded and fallen. But today wasn’t just any day… it was *the* day. No more tomorrows. This was it. 

He turned right around and stared down at Sirius Black. “I love you,” he said, right out loud, before he could stop himself. And once it was out, it was too late to take it back. He was in deep and there was only one way out. “I love you,” he repeated, a little more loudly. 

Sirius stared up at him, dumbstruck, mouth hanging half open. 

Remus only smiled back. He was this far along and was going to finish properly. He raised his voice. “I love you, Sirius Black!” 

Sirius looked about nervously. He looked at James first, though his best friend and his best friend’s girlfriend were both grinning. So was Wormtail, for that matter. When he looked around the room, he saw a couple looks of puzzlement, but for the most part everyone was just watching. Even the professors seated at the staff table were paying attention. And the smile on Dumbledore’s face was unmistakable. 

Remus took a deep breath and his voice grew even louder. He shouted so loudly that everyone in the Great Hall and probably anyone on the ground floor of Hogwarts Castle itself could hear him clearly. “Sirius Black, I love you! I love you, I love you, I love you!”

Sirius sprang to his feet in surprise. He stood there for a moment, still staring, his expression still blank. Then Sirius jumped onto the table. He stood in front of Remus, their eyes locked in an intense gaze. 

Then Remus shrugged and gave an innocent little smile. “I love you,” he said, as if it were the first time he had said it. 

“Yeah,” Sirius said. “I got that part loud and clear.” He smiled a bit shyly. “So I guess it’s time for my part, right?” And with that, Sirius clasped Remus’ face in-between his palms. He moved in and kissed Remus.

Fireworks had absolutely nothing on the kiss. It was as if the entire castle—perhaps the entire world—exploded around the two of them. And as the kiss drowned out the world, all Remus could focus on was the strong pair of lips pressing against his and the man who owned that gorgeous mouth. And when Remus kissed back, the only thing Remus could think was that he never, ever wanted this to stop.

 

Later, when they would lie in bed with each other, limbs intertwined, Sirius would breathlessly ask why in the world they had not done this earlier. Remus would be at a loss for words with which to answer. But it wouldn’t matter anyway because Sirius would start kissing him again before he could get a word out. Maybe he’d be able to tell Sirius tomorrow.

So I asked myself ‘what will it take  
For you to see me in that way?’  
In the great hall, in the great hall,  
I'll stand atop a table and scream, I’ll scream  
“I love you! I love you! I love you, I do!”  
~’Maybe Tomorrow’ by The Remus Lupins  



End file.
